Perfect Rainy-day Porridge

-two girl-handfuls of oats (real oats, not quick oats. i laugh in the face of quick oats. mwa ha ha.)
-some water (enough to cover the oats, plus a bit more)
put on stove, add a pinch of cinnamon and a splash of vanilla. heat and stir until it looks like porridge.
Then add
-some kind of stewed fruit (I recommend rhubarb or quince)
-milk.
Consume, while either dreamily watching the rain, or curling up with a good book.
JUST MAKE SURE you look out for blonde porridge-stealing strumpets. Eating porridge can be dangerous, especially if you're a bear.